Feet, feet and more feet. Tootsies, clodhoppers, leg-hands. Whatever you prefer to call them, that’s the topic of the day and I’m putting the feelers out for your stories on the subject. Do you have an unusual feature, like webbed toes? Perhaps you’ve been through the fungal nail infection from hell and lived to tell the tale? Or maybe you really went there and became a pro ballerina, corns and callouses be damned?

I mean, when it comes to feet, a story worthy of telling has to have some kind of intensity to it, right? Your garden variety, healthy toe-tappers aren’t much to write about, I’m afraid. So, what am I going to do with your stories? Compile a feet-focused short story collection, that’s what. Don’t worry – everything will be fictionalised, so you need not worry about your date knowing about that one time with the ingrown toenail. The collection will have a lightweight, sometimes comedic tone, even if it gets into some gnarly territory.

As for what I’ll make of it, all I can say is that I’ve invested in my share of foot care products. Cheltenham shoppers may or may not have seen me toting a jumbo bottle of ointment out of the discount chemist just the other day, but that’s neither here nor there… we’ve all suffered from dry soles; am I right? Then there was the time I posted a photo of my feet on social media, just after removing my circulation socks after a 14-hour flight, and had my account suspended.

Why am I writing this book in the first place? That’s a valid question. I guess it might seem a tad creepy at first glance. In short, it’s to raise money for my brother’s trip to India, where he plans to set up up a free podiatry clinic. Melbourne friends, does that provide a bit of background to my interest in your feet and their ailments?

More info about the clinic project and details of how to purchase the book will be up soon. For now, just tell me about your freaky feet.