The noble pirate story hasn’t gotten much credit recently. People used to write them all the time, and they ruled the box office for a short time as well. There’s just something about the high seas and swashbuckling adventurers that draws people in…or rather, it used to. Now it’s all superheroes and secret agents. I aim to restart a golden age of piracy in fiction!

Oh, but of COURSE the people in the group don’t agree, and they all think my stories are unrealistic, and Alicia keeps accusing me of not doing my research properly. What’s wrong with a flintlock pistol that has eight shots, like a regular revolver? It could just be a UNIQUE pistol, made by a very smart person. Ugh, negative people.

Maybe I should focus on the more modern tales? Melbourne based outboard motor repair has been making headlines recently, if only because people are trying that foolish paper boat venture yet again. So they can all take a swim, but perhaps I should genuinely be trying to make a modern day pirate story work, with the aid of outboard motor repairs and…anchor winches. I’m a pretty good writer. I’m not held back by such things as ‘subject matter’ and ‘the fact that pirates don’t mesh well with the ins and outs of modern ship repair’. They are only roadblocks that I must overcome with my natural talent. Besides, there are plenty of exciting tales to be woven from such materials. Perhaps pirates could visit Melbourne, having hear tales on the high seas that anchor winch repair in Melbourne is legendary. Of course, they’re not here for anything good and legitimate…and then I’d have to find a way to work in all the sword fighting and swinging from the mast, even though that’s not really possible on the ships of today. No idea. But I know whatever I come up with, it’ll be chomped into oblivion by the group, much like Sheila and tonight’s raisin cake.

-Peter